Originally Published 2/17/2021

Forgiveness is an act that can be hard to practice. For some it is difficult to ask for it, and for others, it is difficult to give. Chances are, however, if you are a human being, you have hurt someone else and have been hurt, too. People typically say they can forgive but not forget. Is it a way of continuing to give someone or something power over you? And what happens if you won’t forgive yourself?

Living in a place where you can’t or won’t reflect, accept, and move on from your own mess will have the same negative impact as not forgiving someone else. When someone else has hurt us deeply, we often take this pain and blame ourselves. We think about how we allowed someone else to take advantage of a spot in our boundaries that wasn’t secure enough, or even a place we didn’t know we needed to secure. But when we blame ourselves, we weaponize the pain as self punishment. The pain we inflict upon ourselves weaponizes the blame as a tool for punishment. We deny ourselves so much because we feel we deserve to suffer indefinitely. Guilt turns to shame, and that shame allows us to deny ourselves the ability to live in alignment.

What does this do to our well being? How does this show up in our mental, emotion, and physical well being?

Although this is SUCH a hard topic, Spirit is always calling me to work within our shadow, and create conversations that ready us for writing a new story about ourselves. If we are living in guilt or shame or a constant cycle of self-blame, we are undoubtedly denying ourselves joy and many of the things that nourish our well-being. Releasing this pain helps us create a container for healing. Knowing we are human and infallible is the first part of seeing ourselves through the lens of compassion so many of us desperately need right now. I hope that this creates a jumping point for reflection and leads to healing for us all.

Attached are some journal prompts for reflection that can help us go inward and examine what we may need to let go and why. 

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